Disclaimer:
This is almost completely fictional. Any resemblance of the characters to real people is unfortunate.
I pity and sympathize with people who know people like this. I once knew a guy like that and it was really bad. He was just soo needy. It finally didnt work out. and then there was also this girl and she was just lame and then you know how it goes.. ok Im rambling.
You have been forewarned. Unfortunate and Coincidental.]
(To be sung in a folky kinda way to mostly G C D G "Boy named Sue" type of feel)
CHAPTER 1: The Straw and the Stirrer
There was a man, as wise as hell,
and he wrote theories too,
he came up with a theory of the Straw and the Stirrer,
and it the world was surprised by it's cool.
The theory was simple and it was anatomical,
The straw was female and stirrer male,
and the rest is obvious of the relation they shared,
in context to the drink they shake.
The stirrer mixes and the Straw sips,
Thus the equation is obvious,
The Stirrer does all the hard work,
and the straw just reaps the rewards.
But the two of them have to be a perfect fit,
or else they fall apart,
and the stirrer has to fit in the straw,
for them to go all out.
And so goes the Theory of the Prat,
With regards to the Straw and Stirrer,
"The straw will fit only that, that has the head to fit,
and each stirrer will have to work, hard to find a straw to hit"
And to illustrate a completely different point,
heres a story about,
A boy named Soupy and a girl named Doll,
You guess, who's the Stirrer and the Straw.
It'll be your time to take a call.
(To Be continued... Tune in, some other time for the next part)
CHAPTER 2 - Soupy and the Nick-Name
Now that you know the Stirrer and the Straw,
the theory is quite twisted,
So here is the story of the Blue Underwear.
It was worn by a boy named Soupy.
The childhood of this boy is a little deluded and hazy,
since you know, he was completely out of it.
Through the times and the ages, he grew up,
and his "out of it"ness just continued to be true.
He would drink and knock out. He would wake up next morning
not knowing where he was and so blue.
But he lived his life from a beer to a thumb
and his the years, past him, blew.
Then one day he grew up and got a job
and he got a coupla girlfriends too.
He had a good time with his bros and his "umm yeah"s,
And he managed to stay sane all through.
He had many clothes and dressed up all good,
Spic and span like the sink,
But little did he know, that through all the years,
The blue underwear was there all through.
This is a story of his Nickname.
Soupy was a good boy. All polite and nice.
And he had a good sense of humour too.
People loved having him around, he was a natural with the Parents.
But his love never seemed to come true.
He had many friends and many crushes who always became friends.
But he was very shy around women.
He mostly overcompensated by making lots of fun
and give them backslapping compliments too.
But never really had the balls to do anything about it.
This earned him the nickname - Mr. No Balls. (Yes is it connected to the story of the chinese balls which Shaggar broke and Soupy lost his manhood)
But all through the years he grew very wary.
And his nickname became a burden he had to solve.
(To be continued.. To know what happens to Soupy and Who is the Doll.. Read later)
CHAPTER 3 - Reinforcing and losing the Nickname
So let us continue, and ive said it thirce,
The story that ensues,
Of the day that we know, Soupy was,
To use his bright new shoes.
This is the story how he reinforced the nickname.
It was a dark evening. It was warm.
The air was salty and he finished peeing.
He was supposed to go and meet some friends
and One of those friends was me.
So Soupy quickly put on his blue underwear,
Hopped on his bike and zoomed,
He reached there as we were crossing the road,
And at Carter Road, almost ran over me.
One of the girl's, Doll, who was there,
wondered for a while who he was.
He took off his helmet and suddenly couldnt see him,
into the darkness he was lost.
He smiled and his teeth shone brighter than the sun,
Shinier than the eye could see.
His exuberance was blinding and Doll was bamboozled
by the sight of who Soupy could be.
She thought he was cute and he thought likewise.
And she continued to talk real fast,
And behind her roll she would hide for a while,
And he just stared real hard.
By the end of the night Doll and her friends,
Were going to go out for a drink,
But Soupy thought he'd take it slow,
So went back home, the 'third night' i think.
And So this is the story of how he started to lose his nickname.
After this he went to Goa,
With JC and Ruchu too.
He stood up to a guy who called him a retard.
And his Blue underwear came to the rescue.
While he was there and while he was drunk,
and while he was out it of too,
and once he was back he couldnt stop thinking,
About this girl named Doll.
So he added her on Facebook and then on gtalk,
and finally got her number too.
All of this with a little 'motivation'
and a large kick on his backside, it's true.
But finally they started talking and one thing led to another,
And he told her he liked her so,
She laughed out loud and didnt stop for a while,
He wondered if she liked him too.
When she finally stopped, 10 minutes later,
She was awkward and so was he,
She blushed for a second and then spat it out,
And told him she liked him too.
(Ooooooo.. to be continuuuued... To find where this story goes and who is the Straw and the Stirrer, look out later for updates)
CHAPTER 4 - Soupy, Doll and the Blue Underwear
So here we approaching the last,
The last of the few laps,
And now the heat is turning up,
Read to find more out.
This is the story of Soupy, Doll and the blue underwear.
He hopped onto a bus and went to where she was,
To figure out whether it was all true.
It was unbelievable and quite fantastic
that a girl liked him too.
All his friends and all his family,
Held their breath as he travelled on this quest,
They let it go as soon as he left,
had a drink and laughed their asses off.
We were all excited and all entralled,
this a was big step for Soupy too,
he had never pursued or done anything like this,
and never had any balls too.
And then he met her finally in daylight,
and they saw each other for a first time true.
Stared into each other's eyes and they held hands,
We all went awwwww soo cute.
The next day, unknowingly to Soupy,
He woke up late for his date,
he put on his makeup, as quick as he could,
and put on his blue underwear too.
They went for a movie, Soupy and the Doll,
Again held hands all through,
Had lots of 'tea', in apostrophes,
and in the rain their fondness grew.
They were riding back home, getting wet in the rain,
She was coughing as she had the flu,
He forced her to get off the road,
and sit in the rain all cozily like glue.
They sat there a bit and twiddled their thumbs,
no thats not slang for nothing else,
And he suddenly, to make conversation, blurted her name,
"Will you out go me with?" Came out.
She looked at him weird and he gave her that smile,
That smile that no girl could resist,
He started to explain and fell all over himself,
And then she shut him up with a kiss.
They sat there a bit as the traffic drove by,
held hands and kissed a little too,
They were soaked to the skin but his balls were back,
and his blue underwear didnt mind too.
(Read the Next part for The Epilogue)
CHAPTER 5 - Epilogue
So here we are, at the end of this part,
and no disclaimer required.
The story is quite clear to us all,
All we need to know is the answer.
We need you to say, who was the Straw,
and who was the Stirrer in the story,
For alas, the confusion is eminent,
Coz it has ended hunky dory.
I'll keep this short and not too long,
the blue underwear is quite worn,
For we will write again and probably again and again,
This is only part of the beating.
And here we end this part of the story,
to know more read later you'll,
For this is only chapter one - five,
Of the story of Soupy and the Doll.
(Answer the question, guess who's the Straw and the Stirrer and be eligible to win a special prize*)
*Conditions apply.
Super cool :)
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